I finally watched the movie Revolutionary Road last night, and I have to say it is not what I expected. I thought it was going to be a 50’s version of "The Story of Us" (1999, Michelle Pfeiffer and Bruce Willis), where they would show the characters’ lives over years and years, but it wasn’t. The whole story actually occurs within a few weeks.
Warning: this review goes through the entire plot in the "Plot" section. If you’re planning on seeing the movie, I advise you to skip that part.
Plot
The premise of this movie is a couple who met at a party (an aspiring actress and a good-for-nothing temp). They get married and her acting career fizzles after poor performances. He takes on a job at a company selling advanced equipment, where his father worked for 20 years. They move to a quaint house in the suburbs (on Revolutionary Road) and have 2 kids: a boy and a girl. Typical American family, but they are not the typical couple.
Unlike everyone else around them, they realized that life should be LIVED and not let pass them by. Dissatisfied with their lives, and finding themselves fighting more and more each day, they decide to move to Paris for a very much needed change.
That decision is put to the test when Leo DiCaprio is offered a promotion working in the computer business, and Kate Winslet gets pregnant unintentionally. As the bread-winner, the husband feels that he might be able to lead a wealthier and better life by taking the job, which makes him reconsider Paris. At the same time, the wife is considering an abortion in order to keep the Paris plans alive.
After many fights about the job and the clearly unwanted baby on the way, they decide not to move after all, which is just the beginning of the utter deterioration of their marriage. This is besides the fact that they have both cheated on each other and show no clear remorse.
After hitting rock bottom one night (HUGE fight), Leo goes to work, and Kate performs the home-abortion way past the "safe" time of 12 weeks of pregnancy. She dies after being taken to the hospital.
Leo never moved to Paris. He moved to the city with his two kids and lives his life in sorrow.
My Thoughts
I watched this movie with my husband. He had many things to say about how dysfunctional their relationship was, starting with the very first fight scene. My husband said that they were not communicating (he’s so cute when he talks about relationships as if he was an expert 🙂 ). I asked him what they could do to save the marriage, and he said "Talk."
I told him that more than "Talking," the thing that was missing was the "Listening." It’s so hard to listen to others sometimes, especially when you are sure they are wrong or acting irrational. It’s much easier to just exercise your right to expressing your feelings by talking about them and making the other person hear you out. If they refuse to listen, then you say they’re not listening (boom, they lose). But why are you doing all the talking in the first place? Why are your feelings more important than the other person’s?
My husband and I have by no means the perfect marriage, and we do get into fights sometimes. What usually makes it OK at the end of the day is that we both have a deep love and respect for each other, and I often tell him that even when I don’t like him, I still love him. It also helps that we both know how to appease the other in a fight, and we know when we really mean an apology. For example, he knows that something as simple as a hug or embrace can melt my bad feelings away, and I know that he doesn’t like to be touched when he’s mad, so I know that I need to make myself behave pleasantly and treat him kindly for his anger to melt away faster. It’s not easy in either case!!! How can he feel like hugging a ball of fire? and how can I make myself be nice when I’m probably as angry as he is? It’s HARD work, but we know that there won’t be any real "listening" going on unless we are both in the right mindset, and we use those means to that end.
Our little "tricks" to help each other through fights are not fool-proof, but as long as the desire to resolve arguments in a favorable manner for both parties is there, we can trust each other to take care of our feelings as well as their own. And I think that’s what it’s all about: loving someone so much that you are willing to put yourself aside for them. If this is a mentality that both partners have, imagine the possibilities for making each other happy.
Going back to the movie, it was clear that there was deep resentment between them, and they did not trust each other with their feelings. They were both out for themselves. Even at their best, they were cheating, withholding, and full of unspoken hatred.
Miserable relationship. Sad movie. Watch it with your significant others and talk about what they could have done better. I just hope neither you nor your significant other place blame on just one of the characters. That would not be a good sign.
To read a real review, check out Maxim’s Movie Reviews blog.
ina