This is how a conversation with my sister went recently:
ina: I’m sick and tired of this bullshit
Monica: (laughs)
ina: I just don’t want to do this anymore. Somethings has got to change!
Monica: Weren’t you working on becoming a teacher?
ina: Yeah, but the subject matter test won’t be until May, which means that I won’t get the scores until July, which means that I won’t get my license until September, and by then it will be too late to apply for jobs for the fall.
Monica: Well, I don’t know how things work over there, but here in Texas you can apply for jobs before getting your license. That’s how I was able to get a job so quickly when I moved up here.
ina: I do know for a fact that I could apply for jobs without a license……
Monica: So what’s stopping you?
ina: …
ina: I’m so scaaaared!
Throughout the conversation I came to understand that I was actively trying to come up with excuses to not switch careers in a few months. I can’t say I know for sure WHY I’m stopping myself. I guess I am not comfortable leaving my job yet because I’m starting out in a new role, and I like the people I’ll be working for, and I certainly don’t want to let them down. Besides that, which sounds like illogical loyalty, I also wonder whether the new job will be better than my last, and I won’t really be giving it a fair try if I am trying to find another job in the meantime.
So I think I am more comfortable staying put for now. I will get my license this year, and I will start looking at jobs when the time is right. I am just very scared of a change like this, and I want to make sure I do it right. No rushing.
ina